Are you wondering which of the six casino buffets in Shreveport is for you? Well, a Gannett reporter has gone through considerable personal hardship to help you out. From The Times:
Sometimes an important story requires sacrifice.
Political reporters bypass “The Colbert Report” for C-SPAN. Sports reporters skip “American Idol” to write the latest Terrell Owens episode. And entertainment reporters risk their inseams to get the skinny on casino buffets.
They are tough jobs, but we do them for you.
I spent six days last week sampling the spreads at the boats. I went. I nibbled. I nibbled some more, all in hope of making your food decisions easier this Labor Day weekend.
And I topped off daily feasts with a dollop of yoga, just to ensure no waistlines were harmed in the pursuit of this story.
Go on to read each of the buffet reviews. People used to buffet reviews from Atlantic City or Las Vegas might be disappointed because there are no letter grades or ranking.
If you want some fun, go to a website that has traveler reviews of casino buffets. I read a few scathing comments about the Excalibur buffet in particular that were quite humorous. It’s particularly poignant when you have a post detailing the numerous lapses in customer service, culinary sophistication, and basic hygiene followed by one saying, “ALL U CAN ETE BSET FUD EVR.”
Back to the story at hand–I’m just going to hazard a guess here, but I’m guessing that this reporter, while in school, never thought that a career in journalism would include filing a story with this in it:
For lunch, I started at China Town and rounded my plate with scoops of sweet-and-sour chicken and teriyaki chicken stir fries. Two ribs from the barbecue station somehow wandered into my fried rice.
As if that weren’t enough, a three story-high slice of lemon meringue pie blocked my view to the exit. For a few minutes, anyway.
I’m not criticizng. If anything, I feel a lot of emphathy. After all, I’m the professional historian who’s been quoted saying things like “casinos got so big!” The exclamation point does it. And opining about telepathic slot machines and the giant alien base under the Strip. All your deluxe suites belong to us, maybe?
Don’t look for too many posts next week. I’m traveling yet again. I’ll try to post some updates if I can, though. If you get very lonely, you can always pre-order your copy of Roll the Bones, whose release date is approaching.