informed informality

These are some thoughts on people, organizations, conflict, and culture. It’s rooted in my ombuds and mediation work, but takes in other things that I study or follow, including history, gambling, conspiracy theories, jazz, and video games.

As a blog, it is a successor to From the Ombuds, which itself is a successor to my earlier Las Vegas and gambling-centric blogging on my own site (Die is Cast, and before that, Casino PTZ), Two Way Hard Three, and other places.

The name, “informed informality,” references one of the four standards of ombuds practice, informality in the sense of assistance that comes outside of formal administrative channels. The “informed” part should imply that, even though I am informal and even casual at times, I have put a lot of thought into this, and hopefully what I say is informed by something.

To PIP or Not to PIP? A Two-Step Alternative That Might Make Everyone Happy

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A recent Wall Street Journal article explored several downsides of the Performance Improvement Plan (PIP), a common management tool that can be a guide for better work or a prelude to termination. The headline makes it clear that the PIP is something to be feared and avoided: “The Most Hated Way of Firing Someone Is […]

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informed informality

React or Respond? The Answer That Changes the Story

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I was cruising along on my Peloton to Sam Yo’s Autumn Recovery Ride when he said something that made me think: “Respond, don’t react.” Sam is a great instructor who not only provides a good guide to the workout, but also some food for thought which, combined with the leisurely pace, gave me the luxury

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informed informality

When You Don’t Know What Your Elbow Is Doing, But You Know Exactly Why

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Let me share something that recently happened to me.  I was demonstrating a variant of a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu position known as side control. It is a fundamental posture that I have been doing, at this point, for years; I have also been on the receiving end more than I would care to remember. I

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informed informality

When Everything Looks Strange

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Have you ever been lost? You know the feeling—not sure which way is up, which is down, whether you are moving closer or farther from your destination. Maybe it doesn’t happen as often these days thanks to GPS and turn-by-turn navigation, but if you’ve ever gotten lost, you understand how demoralizing, how confusing it is.

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informed informality

Why I Have Negative Knowledge (A Casino Security Reminiscence)

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I feel compelled to share some thoughts about an experience I had when I worked casino security. This isn’t a tale of a foiled robbery or other heroics. It’s not a story about seeing people at their worst or making a difference in someone’s life. No, it’s something a little more mundane, and hopefully relatable.

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informed informality

Who Do We Appreciate?

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What do we need from others to feel appreciated? And can being appreciated be better than being understood? In the past I have written about the importance of Mary Rowe’s concept of “microaffirmations,” small acts that, when practiced regularly, can promote belonging and improve a culture. Last week, I led nine workshops for Rebel Ready

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informed informality

The Orpheus Syndrome, or When Asking Makes It Worse

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I have had the story of Orpheus and Eurydice on my mind, and not just because I recently saw Hadestown. A quick summary: Orpheus’s wife, Eurydice, died of a snakebite. The grieving Orpheus journeyed to the underworld, where he moved everyone with his singing, including the big bosses Hades and Persephone. They permitted him to

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informed informality

Chance, Ignorance, and Human Behavior

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Reading Jared Poley’s Luck, Leisure, and the Casino in Nineteenth-Century Europe: A Cultural History of Gambling (a fine book on the subject), a 125-year old observation struck me as relevant to those of us who have questions about the future, which I guess we all do, since future events will affect us in the future.

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informed informality

Stolen Time and Unexpectedly Friendly Cats

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I recently saw a work of art that got me thinking quite deeply about communication. Nikita Gale’s TEMPO RUBATO (STOLEN TIME), consisting of a modified player piano, audio, and a lighting system, is currently exhibited as part of the Whitney Biennial at the Whitney Museum of American Art. Gale describes the installation as “a player

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informed informality

Seeing from Above and Below by Listening

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Have you ever read something that just pops? Like, you are amazed that you’ve never seen this concept explained in this way, and you’re a little miffed that you haven’t done it yourself? Or is that just me? I’m asking because I recently had an experience like that, and I’d like to share it with

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informed informality

The Oracle, the Prophet, and Wishful Hearing

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The Pythia, or Oracle at Delphi, was sought out for her predictions. The high priestess of Apollo, the Greek god of music, prophecy, medicine, the sun, and assorted other odds and ends, she shared, on demand, prophecies divined from the god himself. The stories of her forecasts reveal a nearly universal human truth: we often

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informed informality

Do Expectations Push or Punish Us?

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Early in my ombuds career, I was told that conflict, more often than not, is driven by unmet expectations. Talking with participants in dozens, if not hundreds of large and small conflicts through, I absolutely agree. Almost always, unsatisfied expectations, whether verbalized or not, are at the root of interpersonal and even institutional issues. One

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informed informality