Ordinarily I wouldn’t spend the time posting about an adult entertainment expo, but this Las Vegas Sun article got me thinking, particularly this bit:
Representing a more directly applied technology, Marques Lyons, a promoter for Zeus Electrosex, is luring passers-by with a demo of his somewhat frightening battery-operated products. “What we’ve done is take stimulation which can be very complex for people and simplify it.”
I’m going to turn the question in the headline into a statement:
Best. Name. Ever.
Thanks to the G-rated description of Zeus Electrosex’s wares, I’m not 100% sure about their product line, but I’m completely confident that I’ll never walk into a store and say, “Hey, this stuff looks okay, but do you have anything by Zeus Electrosex?” Even so, this has got to be one of the best names I’ve ever heard for anything. It just sounds like the perfect name for a purveyor of “somewhat frightening battery operated products.”
You probably think I’ve painted myself into a corner here, but I can pull this back into gaming and related issues.
Back in November, Las Vegas Sands announced that they had come up with a name for the Venetian/Palazzo/Sands Expo complex. Something evoking style, sophistication, and luxury. Something that they’d hopefully put a great deal of thought into. Something to set them apart in an increasingly crowded upscale Strip market. And the name they chose (get ready for it) was…
MEGACENTER.
In all caps, no less. There was a spirited comment thread on Two Way Hard Three. One guy laughed so hard he almost spit his oatmeal out. Others wondered whether they could get their tires rotated there. I helped out, too: I referenced Megaweapon, completely mystifying anyone who didn’t watch a show that was on at midnight on Comedy Central 12 years ago.
What gives? The guy selling sex toys can come up with an absolutely perfect name for his wares, but the people running a multi-billion dollar resort complex can only offer something that makes the local strip mall sound upscale. Seriously, if someone asked me to choose between buying my groceries at Desert Crossing or MEGACENTER based on the name alone, I’d choose the former.
Here’s a win-win-win scenario: Las Vegas Sands hires the guy who named Zeus Electrosex as a consultant. He comes up with an equally evocative name for the resort juggernaut at Sands and the Strip. LVS wins because they get a better name. Mr. Electrosex wins because he gets some money in his pocket. And we all win because we don’t have to live in a world where one of the most expensive pieces of real estate in the country is called MEGACENTER.